2 W W ...

Have you ever wished you could switch to an alternate universe? I have, often, and my advice is be careful what you wish for.
My sister told me last week that what got her through the minefield of 2 yrs of IVF was posting on a fertility web site. Against my better judgement I caved in and had a look at one last night.
Note 1
It’s all aimed at women in relationships having fertility problems. Fertile, single, hetro women are unrepresented.
Note 2
The site was completely unintelligible, I literally couldn't comprehend the testimonials for acronyms. I had no real desire to decipher them but one that kept recurring and bothering me was ‘2WW’. Eventually I got cross with this secret underworld and their codes and went to bed feeling like an inferior being.
As I drifted into sleep I had one of those epiphanies one sometimes has when your brain stops trying.
2WW = 2 Week Wait !
This is the name given to the alternate universe I now exist in.
It is one where you’re not allowed to smoke, booze or drink coffee. One where you can’t lift heavy weights, ingest chemical fumes or have hot baths. One where crazy things like eating pineapple cores are advised.
And all this for a 10-15% chance of being pregnant.
Adhering to all these restrictions is obviously some form of madness as under normal circumstances a ‘mother to be’ would have no idea what state she’s in at this early stage, and may well be living life as a drinking, smoking furniture removal lady having gloriously hot baths at the end of every tough day, all with no negative consequence to her future offspring.
But with knowledge comes responsibility.
Annoying, but to be fair this is all a nano price to pay.
Another symptom of this ‘2 Week World’ is that any tiny sensation felt within a 6 inch radius of ones navel is either your period about to happen or your future child implanting, depending on your mood. Again, patently a form of delusional madness that even level headed old me can’t exempt myself from.
So far I’m finding it quite amusing how the mind tricks one and I’m observing it with interest. I’m sure I won’t be quite so Zen a few cycles down the line, but that’s how it is today.

Ps I've failed to confess that I have completely redesigned my apartment in the last week and am having a new carpet fitted tomorrow. Long live distraction therapy.